Bleeding Ryou
by yaoi coveness
Summary: Ryou's down, and Bakura gets to see an interesting memory about Ryou's mom, but were will it lead?


Bleeding Ryou

Rating: pg-13

Warning: sadness

Disclaimer: I own Nothing

Angst, death and a little ooc

Enjoy.

Bakura had never seen Ryou like this before. He was simply, there. He looked lost and sad. A small part of Bakura said he should feel bad because, it was most likely his fault that Ryou was feeling the way he was. He wondered about, there, but not. His eyes looked far away, as if he could see beyond what every one else was seeing.

This had been going on for a week before any one seemed to noticed. Ryou always just smiled and said he was fine and that they where imagining things when they asked him about it. For a while it seemed as if he would be ok, but then his dad came home. Bakura was not expecting Ryou to be yelling at him to disappear when he got this news, but Bakura decided to humor his hikari and go into the Ring.

The turning point for Ryou's happiness, if that's what you could call it, happened the night before his dad left. They got into a fight and Ryou got up-set, nothing new, Ryou got up-set about a lot of things, and very easily. However this time he was not just a little up-set, he was all out crying like the end of the world, I hate you kind of crying.

At first Bakura paid no heed to the incessant wailing. It wasn't until a version of Ryou came out of his soul room and into Bakura's that he took notice.

"Hello." The small voice had startled Bakura. When Bakura looked around he was not expecting to find a version of a five year old Ryou. "Can you help me? I can't find my mom." The small child looked at Bakura with painfully sad eyes.

"Fine." Came the cold reply. Bakura had not meant to say that, but it came out anyways.

The small Ryou smiled and took Bakura's hand. Bakura walked him back to his soul room. "She's in there some where." He said and was about to walk away, but the small child wouldn't let go.

"You said you would help me find her. I need my mommy!!" The small child yelled as tears came down his cheeks.

"Fine!!" Bakura was getting a little ticked at this child now. He followed the small child into a massive hallway. It was sterilized from top to bottom. It took Bakura a little while, but he soon recognized it as being a hospital. "Why are we here?" Bakura asked the little Ryou. He knew nothing good could be going on if they were in there.

"My mommy's sick, they're going to make her better." He looked down at the small child and saw a heartbreakingly sweet grin.

"Ryou....Ryou!!" They both turned to see a younger version of Ryou's dad come out of a room. "There you are, you shouldn't run off like that."

"M'sorry daddy. Can we take mommy home yet?" His smile was half hearted at best confirming Bakura's thought about whatever was going on here was not good.

"Not yet Ryou. Soon. I hope." He was about to continue, but a faceless woman started to take to him.

The little Ryou let go of Bakura's hand and ran off towards the room his dad had just come from. Bakura followed closely. Inside was dark. There was only one bed. Lying on the bed was a woman, a very pale woman.

"Mommy!!!" The little Ryou yelled running up next to the bed. "Mommy, are you feeling better? Mommy!?!"

The woman slowly opened her eyes and turned her head to the chair that Ryou had climbed up on. "I am now little Tenshi." She said smiling.

Bakura had never seen Ryou's mother before. She was really beautiful, even if she was in a hospital. She has flawless pale skin, just like Ryou and dark brown eyes, just like Ryou, and soft white hair, just like Ryou. Ok, Bakura was sensing something here, maybe the reason Ryou was so....so....so like _that_ was because he was just like he mother.

He looked over at the little Ryou who had now decided that he should climb up on to the bed with his mother.

"Mommy." Came the small word. "When can we go home?"

The pain in his mothers was hard to look at. "Soon baby....Soon." She crooned to her child. You could hear the tears in her voice as she spoke softly to her small child.

Ryou was soon asleep, but Bakura stayed, having very few happy memories of his own mother, it was nice to see one of Ryou's. He stood there watching, wondering why Ryou was here? Why this memory?

The door opened, startling Bakura out of his thoughts. "Natasha, what are you doing? He shouldn't be in here."

"Shhhh. James. I may be dying, but there is no reason I can't see my child before I go." She shot back, obviously annoyed that anyone would want to make her child go.

"I know." Ryou's dad said looking down slightly. "It's just...."

"It's just what James?" She questioned

"It's just...We could have avoided this. You wouldn't be here....if ..we ....hadn't.."

"Don't you ever finish that sentence James. I will not have you blaming Ryou for this, it's not his fault."

"Yes, it is Natasha. If you hadn't had him we wouldn't be here. You knew what would happen if you had a kid."

"Yes. So did you. I've wanted a child since I was a child James, I'm not, not going to have one because I could die."

"But..."

"My life is worth his James, don't you ever think otherwise. And don't you ever tell him that this was his fault. It's not. I was the one who wanted a child, not him. He's perfect James, I would trade my life for his any day, and so would you." She stopped, he tears falling down her checks as she protested and gave instruction to Ryou's dad. "Don't ever say that he did this, love he no matter what, not matter who, or what he becomes James. He's my treasure, and I will be his angel, since I won't be able to be with him any other way."

At this point both his mom and dad were crying. Ryou remained curled up next to his mother as she spoke. When she was done, she lay down and smiled a weak smile. She hugged her little Tenshi, as she called him. She closed her eyes and rested back. She never opened her eyes again. She stopped breathing after a little while. Bakura watched as Ryou's dad cried.

Ryou soon woke up to the noise. He turned and pushed he mother, as if to wake her, but nothing happened. "Mommy." Came the distressed cry. Mommy...Wake up." He was getting a bit alarmed that his mom wouldn't wake up.

"She's not going to wake up Ryou." His dad told him as he tried to lift him off the bed. Ryou moved fast and hung on to his mother.

"Why not?" Ryou's tears were falling down his perfect face.

"She's an angel now Ryou. Remember what mommy said about angels?"

"Yes. She said they watch over you, but you can't touch or see them....." the child Ryou was obviously thinking behind those dark brown eyes. Then understanding came pouring into them, along with an abundance of tears. Ryou crawled off the bed and over to his dad were he cried.

Suddenly everything around Bakura went black, as the memory ended. Bakura decided to come out and see if Ryou was ok.

"Ryou." He whispered out to his hakari, who was lying on his stomach crying still.

Bakura sat on the edge of the bed and rubbed Ryou's back. "Are you ok Ryou?"

"Was it my fault?" Ryou whispered out.

"Was what your fault?"

"My mother dying."

"No. Why?"

Ryou moved over so his head was in Bakura's lap. He stared up at Bakura, the tears still falling from the deep brown depths of his eyes. "My...My dad said I killed her...He said he wished I was never born, then my mom was better to have around then me." Ryou wept to Bakura.

"No. Ryou, that's not true. It wasn't your fault, you did nothing wrong." Bakura crooned.

Bakura moved so that he could lie down next to Ryou. Ryou moved and continued to cry into Bakura's chest. Bakura's arms found there way around the slim waist and back of Ryou. Together they lay there, Bakura whispering sweet nothings to calm Ryou down.

Bakura awoke to an empty bed and the sound of running water coming from Ryou's bathroom. He looked over at the closed door and wondered a little, but dismissed the late shower. What got to Bakura, was how long the water had been running, it must have been half and hour before he opened the door to check on Ryou. He expected to be assaulted by steam, not by frigid air. He looked for Ryou, finding him in a small corner of the bath tub, ice water falling down on him.

Bakura reached out to turn off the water when he heard something.

"Don't." A simple word. He looked back over to Ryou, he was looking up from his knees, his eyes where hollow shadows.

Bakura's hand moved away from the knob, Ryou's eyes watched him intently as he moved. "Out." Came the next command. Bakura was damned, he followed that one to.

Bakura couldn't figure out why he was following Ryou's orders like that, it just seemed to him like he should. Back in the bedroom Bakura found his way back to the bed, where he listened and waited.

I was about ten to fifteen minutes before the water finally stopped. Bakura thought Ryou would be out soon. It was an other twenty minutes before Ryou finally opened the door.

At first Bakura was glad his hikari had finally come out, he looked at Ryou noting the pajama bottoms and lack of shirt. That was a little strange, but nothing he couldn't dismiss. That was until he saw the blood, dripping down Ryou's wrists and hands and on to the carpet. He looked back seeing Ryou's shirt covered with blood. Ryou walked right by a gapping Bakura and flopped down on his bed, letting out a sigh.

As Bakura stood gapping, trying to figure out what just happened Ryou was moving to his nightstand and pulling out various items. He then sat up and proceeded to bandage up his arms.

When he was done, he finally took a notice that Bakura was in the room with him he smiled cheerfully at him. "All done." Came the happy voice.

Bakura's mind could not figure out what had just happened. He stared dumbly at Ryou for a little before it fell into place for him. "Why?" Bakura asked

"Why? Because it feels good. Everything that's bad is washed away with the blood, and the pain feels so good when your done."

Bakura shook his head at Ryou, not sure what to do, if he should do anything at all.

"Don't worry Bakura, I know what I'm doing when I do this. I've done it before, just promise me one thing."

"What?"

"Don't tell the others."

"Agreed." Bakura stated.

"Thank you Bakura." Ryou smiled before yawning and lying back down on his pillow and falling asleep quite quickly. Bakura lingered for a moment before going to his room and getting some sleep too.

In the morning, everything seemed fine. Ryou was happy and cheerful. He wore long sleeves for a while after that as the cuts healed. No one knew, no one did anything. It wasn't until other marks showed up, bruises and such. As soon as people saw these they blamed him. It was true he was doing them, but not for the reasons they thought he was. Ryou had come to Bakura and asked him to hurt him. It was a release for him, a way out, to escape his pain.

So now Bakura stands in front of Ryou, hitting him, because Ryou asked him to. All because Ryou wants it, and needs the pain to carry on, to erase all the bad feelings he has eating at his insides.

Owari

Sorry this was such a downer, but I needed to write it. And for any who don't know, slitting is very therapeutic, if you know what your doing.

Note:I do know that Ryou had a sister, but she was his step sister and her and her mom died in a car crash when Ryou was 7.(this is what I get for not having any other pass times).

Please Read and Review, Thank you for reading.

Thorn


End file.
